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Uh, yes, is Prince Bandar there? This is his buddy Jerry Jones...
“Jones. J-O-N-E-S. It’s an American name and it’s – ha-ha! – fairly well-known over here. Huh? No, I’m not a Jonas Brother. I own the Dallas Cowboys. The football team? The one with that big new stadium that’s not in Dallas? That’s right, the guys with the silver-and-blue star – just like he painted on his airplane. “Yes. Jones. It’s long-distance, so could you hurry? I’m way over my minutes for this month. “Prince Bandar? How ya doin’? Whew! I thought that Arabian pit bull that answers the phone was never going to put me through! “Oh, this is still the pit bull?
“Well – ha-ha! – that’s a hoot! No! ‘Pit bull’ is a high compliment over here. I’m often called one myself! Michael Vick? Never heard of him – or thought about hirin’ him. We love our quarterback, and he loves animals! Sure, I’ll hold for his Excellency... “Bandy? Is it really you this time? That’s a relief. I thought I was going to have to leave a voice-mail with that trained camel that memorizes your messages and spits ‘em back! Ha-ha! “Oh, you own AT&T? Well, I guess you’ve got all the gadgets, then. Yeah that I-phone thingie is great. Sure, you can friend me if you want to... “This call? Well, I was just wonderin’ why you didn’t come to our big game Sunday night – what with you havin’ that half-million-dollar suite right next to mine and all... “Ramadan? Why, heck yes! You could stay in a Ramada Inn if you wanted, or even a Hyatt or a Hil– “Oh. Not the hotel? Shoot, that’s right, you’ve got a house over here. I knew that! Ha! So, are you talkin’ about those little noodles? Tell me you didn’t stay home just because you like those Ramadan Noodles! I can get you cases of ‘em! All flavors! Chicken, gar– “Oh, a holiday? I don’t get it. A holiday weekend’s a great time to jet over and watch some Cowboys football! “Wow. Really? Not even a cracker? You guys take your religious holidays pretty serious! I mean, we love Thanksgiving and Christmas, but we sure as heck watch some football after we’re done gorgin’ ourselves. “Well, okay, we’ll look for you later in the season. I just hate that you missed the home opener and all. We reopened the Ring of Honor, had ol’ George W. toss the coin! Everybody was here – over a hunnerd thousand of ‘em. People paid me $29 bucks just to stand and drink and watch it on a big screen! “Uh, the game? Well, you know, the Giants are pretty tough. “The score? Well, it was real close. You can read the details on your little I-Phone if you want. But hey – we’re 1-1 and we won the pre-season! |
